Useful Tips to Help You Survive Your High-Conflict Divorce

 Posted on November 18, 2020 in Divorce

Getting a divorce is rarely easy, but for some couples, the divorce process can be especially troublesome. It is normal for a divorcing couple to have disagreements, but when it seems as if the conflict will never cease, you can begin to feel worn down and burnt out. This can end up affecting not only your divorce case, but your physical and mental health, too. In many cases, a high-conflict divorce is the product of a high-conflict spouse. Often, it is possible to predict whether or not your spouse is likely to be combative or difficult to work with during your divorce process, allowing you to prepare yourself emotionally, mentally, and practically. 

Managing the Divorce Process With a Difficult Spouse

If you are going through a high-conflict divorce, here are a few ways to help you survive:

• Limit the contact you have with your spouse. The easiest way to limit the stress of a high-conflict divorce is to limit the amount of communication you have with your spouse. A high-conflict spouse may thrive off of the arguments and the rise they can get out of you, so limiting the amount of time you spend talking with one another limits the amount of time they have to escalate the situation. Try to cease face-to-face communication and keep emails, text messages and phone calls short and simple.

• Consider parallel parenting techniques, rather than co-parenting. Another thing to keep in mind is that co-parenting may not be right for you. In some situations, you may never be able to communicate and cooperate with your spouse well enough to co-parent your children in a healthy manner. Instead, you should consider trying parallel parenting, which is an alternative approach that minimizes contact between parents who cannot get along.

• Be realistic with your expectations. When dealing with a high-conflict spouse, it is important that you do not set your expectations too high. You should focus on what you can control rather than what you cannot control. Rather than trying to change or control what your spouse says, thinks, or does, focus on controlling the way you react and handle the situation. 

Contact a DuPage County Divorce Attorney

High-conflict divorces can be extremely long, stress-ridden processes that often involve a lot of disagreements and do not settle easily. In many high-conflict divorce cases, the issues must be taken to court before resolutions are found. At the Goostree Law Group, we strive to help our clients through their divorce in the way that best suits their needs, whether that be through settling or through litigation. To schedule a free consultation with one of our skilled Wheaton, IL divorce lawyers, call our office at 630-364-4046.

Sources:

https://esme.com/resources/divorce/getting-through-a-high-conflict-divorce

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/anxiety-zen/201709/marriages-come-and-go-high-conflict-divorce-is-forever